This one is fresh from gramps laptop...and fairly entertaining as well!




*Only in** **America** ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of *


*the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. **




**Only in** **America** ......do people order*


*double cheeseburgers, large fries, and* * a diet coke. *


*



**Only in** **America** ......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to * * the counters. *


*



**Only in** **America** ......do we leave cars*


*worth thousands of dollars in the*


*driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.**




**Only in** **America** ......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. **




**Only in** **America** ......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. **




**Only in** **America** ......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. **




**EVER WONDER ....**




**Why the sun lightens our hair,* *
**but darkens our skin** **?**
*
*


**Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? **




**Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? **




**Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?** **




**Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'? **




**Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? **




**Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? **




**Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? **




**Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?** **




**Why didn't Noah swat those two** ** mosquitoes? *


*



**Why do they sterilize the needle for* * lethal injections?*


*



**You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! **




**Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?* *< BR>
**


**Why are they called apartments when*


*they are all stuck together?**




**If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? **




**If flying is so safe,**
**why do they call the airport the terminal?